would you love me if i were 300 pounds?

I've asked Kenley that very question. I have to admit, I was serious.

I'm reading Women Food and God and wrote that question in the margins. At what point did I attach love to weight? By asking Kenley if he would love me if I gained a lot of weight also means that I'm asking him, do you love me because I am at this weight.

True love can't be connected to physical appearance. Love is a heart issue.

The bigger question for me is to ask...would I love myself if I were 300 pounds? And the next question, would I love myself at my weight now? And would I love myself at a lower weight. If I can't love Jara for Jara, if I can't love myself now I won't ever love myself. It doesn't matter how many calories I count or how many points I have leftover for the day.

So, I love love. And I love Jara. I'll write more about the things that i'm finding in this book later. Now, I'd like to rest.
love.