new little look

I changed my blog template...I don't know, what do you think? I also don't know much about changing the template that much...do you have any favorite gadgets/add-ons/widgets???

courage

I think that one of the things that I have learned in the past few years regarding my health journey is courage and fearlessness. I recently heard a description of fearlessness that makes so much sense. It's not about not fearing anything or not acknowledging fear, fearlessness is about knowing about the fear, it's also about knowing the fear and facing it.

I think in lots of times in my life i've heard reflections of...take care of your family, do your job...but when you have time, take care of yourself. It takes a lot of courage to let yourself be important...not in a way that disregards the rest of the world, but in a way that acknowledges the care that you need for your own body. I've been reflecting on this for awhile...this idea of loving our neighbors as ourselves. We need more love around the world. For ourselves and for others.

Love.

all you have to do is breathe

I won't get tired of being reminded to breathe. In the P90X yoga the instructor reiterates the need to just breathe...some of the moves will be difficult, but all you do have to do is breathe.

I love it.

We will always be in the midst of change. That's the nature of life. We have a choice to welcome it or ignore it. Today I welcome it and see how it will change me and grow me.

the other things i think about

Yes, I think health is attached to all parts of our lives...mind, body and soul. When one of those is out of whack, we are out of whack people and wacky people. You know those people in your lives who seem a little off and they sort of cyclone their mess everywhere? I've been that person before...sometimes I still am.

But I wanted to give you a little glimpse into other things that I am passionate about at this moment.

Circles and what they mean for the hope and future of organizations, our communities and our world
Marriage - K and I celebrated our 8 months of marriage, it's really fun, we are growing a lot
Family - I love my family, they came to visit this week, they recenter me in a way that no one else can.
Garden - I saw our first tomato today...small but it's there
Diversity/Inclusion - This has always been on my heart...let's be real, 100 years ago, what would a black woman be doing...and what would you be doing, let's start this conversation and figure out how to make our communities better places for everyone
Friends - I have been surrounded by amazing friends who are family
Healthy food - honoring the body
Justin Bieber - :)

You all love me.

My journey...ups and downs

One of my friends posted a blog about experiencing a health plateau. If you look through some of my older posts from three years ago..you'll notice the shift of some my blog posts.

I had gotten very close to my goal weight, I was ten pounds away from losing some 97 pounds. I was on top of the world, but the last ten pounds were slipping through my fingers. At that time I couldn't name what was going on with me.

In that year of losing weight I had people commenting on my weight like never before, I had found new confidence, I was wearing new clothes, I got lots of stars and prizes at Weight Watchers. But then everything that I had been doing didn't seem to work anymore. It actually felt like my body was fighting against me and it was totally unfair.

Looking back at that time I wish I had taken a moment to really celebrate what I had accomplished beyond the scale. I lost my confidence as I actually had attached it to the number on the scale. I had put so much emphasis on the weight that I stopped paying attention to my emotions. I love WW and all that it has taught me, I love counting points/calories/portions, but what's more important for me and my health is paying attention to my emotions. There was a reason that I had gotten to 230 + pounds and that reason was still there in a girl who was almost 100 pounds lighter.

This part of my health journey is different...most of the changes I've seen have been internal and feel foundational. I encourage anyone who is struggling with a plateau to listen to their bodies...what is actually happening, what can you celebrate. Sometimes I got so involved in the end result of weight loss that I forgot that the most important part of the journey is the process and being present in it. That's life.

You got this!

sweet sweet saturdays.

I crave the pace of Saturdays. I don't know, some of the mornings I have remind me of playing YMCA soccer as a kid.

I would wake up, stumble around and find my shin guards, my socks, my uniform and wait for my parents and brother. Water bottle ready...are we bringing snacks, oranges. Off to the field. I love the magical feeling when you arrived on the field. If you ever played soccer, you know what it is...it was the best when you caught a morning game, the morning fog would start to burn, the sun start to rise, and you'd feel the humidity start to grow near your feet. If I was in one of the first games, the soccer complex would be empty, it was a glorious feeling. Ball out, gear down, and that first dribble and warm up. Gosh. I miss the days of soccer. I'm enjoying the world cup because just watching the game, my muscles have their sweet memory!

SO, this morning, I woke up, stumbling, got my gear to teach class. Grabbed my Itouch, water bottle and was in my car on my way. We live close to the gym and i'm thankful for that...cause I was running a little late. At the gym, checked in on foursquare, and made my way to the 3rd floor room...got the music playing and was in the zone.

I made it home, worked in the garden, finished my workout, ate my lunch...and am now trying to figure out what my week of blogs will be. And it's not even noon yet.

I love love love love Saturdays. It's the lucky day stuck between two days of....Friday...it's a work day...sort of want to sleep when I get home day...and then Sunday...oh tomorrow's Monday. Saturday lasts forever in my books and that's okay.

my 30th Birthday

I am excited to turn 30 next year. Just being with my parents this weekend reaffirmed my excitement to turn 30. My parents have poured their lives out for me and my brother and every single life is a miracle. And I am so freaking thrilled to turn 30. Sometimes I wonder if people will take me more seriously, but you know what, if people don't take me seriously now, turning 30 won't change a thang...

I'm starting a new challenge for whole health and whoever is interested can join. In anticipation for my next birthday I am going to find healthy things that I want to do or continue doing....or stop doing as a gift to myself. Being healthy is the best gift I can give to myself and to others.

If you want to join me, let me know, stay tuned, i'll start blogging a bit more about it in a few days.